I had this whole idea of a blog post on how to have a mindful fourth of July, but I have to scrap it because I couldn’t focus to finish it. After a deep dive google search and a phrase just spewing from my mouth would result in this week’s blog post about Soul exhaustion- who would have thought it would have been that.
It seems like the more I work on myself through this self-improvement journey. I am finding more and more things about myself that explain A LOT. I have posted on Instagram, even on here before, that I have been in a funk. When I have been in this funk and didn’t know how to get out of it. Eventually, I finally got out of my little funk and moved on with my life… or so I thought.
This past week I have been in a MAJOR funk and I couldn’t put into comprehendible words to describe what I felt. I couldn’t understand what was happening because I have been sleeping amazingly, bought a new memory foam mattress pad for our bed. Sleep has been amazing, I sleep 8 hours a night like a baby. We went back to the gym. I was journaling… living my best life. I was doing great then BAM!
Trying to figure out what is wrong
I am tired, I have no motivation, I sit down to work on a post and I ended up making something to track my progress on said posts. Because of this, I can’t focus. Then I beat myself up because my house isn’t a mess, but some things do need to be done around here. Dinner has been made once this week by me.
I know I have talked before about being mentally and emotionally exhausted, but this feeling was MORE than that. When you have been mentally and emotionally exhausted you know what that feels like and this wasn’t it. I knew what had to be done, I was more than willing to do it, but my physical being wouldn’t let myself do it. If that makes sense.
The phrase that changed everything
Last night I finally said to Mike “I don’t know what’s going on with me, I am tired, unmotivated, can’t focus. Maybe I am feeling a little depressed, but I don’t think that’s it. I am all those things but I don’t feel it in my body. Its kind of like my soul is tired.”
He didn’t really understand what I meant. So I explained it as “the way you can see my aura around my body, it radiates this energy, but now think of seeing my aura inside (as in my soul) and what it is radiating. That part of me is tired.”My soul is tired
What is soul exhaustion?
Your soul is exhausted. And soul exhaustion is all-consuming. Soul exhaustion will drain your spirit in a way you never knew possible. Soul exhaustion can feel as if you’re running a marathon without an end. Medium.com by Megan Minutillo
I have never experienced this before EVER. That one phrase sent me down this rabbit hole last night. I was very glad to see I was not the only one who has thought this. During my rabbit hole, I found this article on the site The Minds Journal.
On the site, they have this test of rubbing your palms together for 30 seconds then slowly start pulling your hands apart. What I felt was the energy disappear almost instantly. I was convinced that my soul is tired. It wasn’t physically my body, it was my physical being that is tired. My mind is officially blown.
So I want to share with you the things I am going to do this weekend to awaken my soul.
Move my body
As much I say to Mike I don’t want to go to the gym. I always end up going and feel amazing after a great workout. I have specific goals I want to reach especially with my PCOS. Even if I don’t go to the gym I still want to move my body while at home. Moving your body especially to a good playlist can easily wake up your soul. I created a feel-good music playlist that just makes me want to dance around the house and let loose. In addition, I have a playlist for cleaning the house. Take a lookie if interested.
These next 3 I can do all at the same time or individually. Its all up to me.
I am not one to meditate but I think just sitting or laying down focusing on myself and clearing my mind could definitely help. Take the time to clear the cache and cookies stuck in my brain. Realizing I am an empath I feel a lot of things that are not my own feelings. It’s the remnants left over from the people I have come into contact with.
I noticed this morning that laying in bed last night. I thought maybe I just need to cuddle with Mike. So when he woke up to use the bathroom I took that opportunity to cuddle with him by laying my head on his chest. I found myself trying to match his breathing. I found myself going to sleep easier. His breaths were short but deep. I found myself relaxing a lot quicker. I woke up this morning feeling slightly normal. Obviously the deep breathing helped. I started and finished this post. Yay me!
Listen to relaxing music
I think I have talked about this before but I have been into listening to Lo-Fi music on YouTube. Listening to it a lot while I am writing because it doesn’t have a lot of words and make me want to sing along to it. I can just listen to these relaxing beats and work. I also have a playlist of all my favorite Lo-Fi Playlists.
Add more art into my life
I don’t need to add more writing to my life because I blog almost every week, but I also journal. First, I am going to get a sketchbook just for coloring, water coloring, mixed media art. Second, I would love to find a hobby I enjoy that I could make money from on the side. I find a lot of things on my Pinterest board private like making jewelry, making tumblers, bath bombs, shower bombs. I need to take some money to buy the products to try some of these. Just be creative and have fun.
Go be in nature or by the water
My cousin just posted on Facebook yesterday about how much she needed to be by the water and I had been thinking about it all day. I want to walk a trail with greenery and water. I need to get out of this house. My environment is starting to affect my health. I want to lose my thoughts in between the trees and water.
I have been wanting to go to the beach since January and now we are in month 7 of not being able to go and fully enjoy myself. You know pandemic and shit happening. Not gonna chance it. I may have to buy a tiny family pool and set it up in my backyard just to lay in and float around. Let my body be weightless and get lost in nothingness echo because my ears are underwater. I want a full day to catch some sun and be one in nature.
Now I just have to do some research to find one in Tampa. Wish me luck. I share it on my Instagram if I find it. If you live in the area shoot me a message on Instagram and let me know if you know of a spot I would love.
My weekend plans
Go for a hike to clear our heads (take my sketchbook to draw what I see)
Pick up a healthy lunch while out
Go to the gym
Come home to make dinner
Watch a movie with my love
Watch fireworks from my front porch (it’s the 4th of July baby)
Wake up in the morning and do my morning routine
Spend the day home just chilling
Make Banana Nut Bread
Put on some good music
Light my favorite candle
Meditate in the bathtub (I will not be buying a pool this weekend.)
Go to bed early
Take the time to recharge and reconnect with your soul
We are in the 7th month of the year and I feel it taking a toll on me inside and out. I never thought I would have said “My soul is tired”. That is a phrase I never thought would come out of my mouth. Who is this girl? I am becoming more spiritually intuitive with my body and what it needs. So much so that I knew something was off and I knew it wasn’t my normal off. Don’t ignore the signs, you don’t want to make yourself more exhausted than you already are.
That’s all you can hope for while on your improvement journey is that you start to notice the 4 W’s. You know what, where, when, and who are affecting you. Start identifying those triggers and avoid them if you can. Pay attention to your environment and those 4 W’s. You might just be able to save yourself from Soul exhaustion and wondering what you did to make yourself feel this way. Please realize it’s not you, it’s them or your surroundings.
Until next time, Have a great day!