Over the past 7 years, Mike and I have come up with a system that helps us stay on track with our goals. We call it a life audit where we ask ourselves 4 Questions that really help us reflect on who we want to be, who we want in our lives, and how we want to live our lives. We do monthly check-ins and then one big giant audit at the end of the year.
Growing up I remember having this mentality that it was me against the world and no one really cared about me. So, F them. I would constantly judge people thinking they were already judging me. In addition to those who were nice to me, I would be rude for no reason. I honestly thought they didn’t really care about me anyway. So why be nice to them. You are probably asking yourself what does this have to do a life audit. I bring this up to show you how doing these audits really changed my personality and demeanor. I went from a not nice person to wanting everyone to live their best lives.
This mentality lasted a long time. I can’t tell you specifically what changed or when it changed. I just know it did. If you ask me what I think it was, I would tell you it could be all the crappy relationships I was in or the experiences I have had with people who are just unhappy with their lives, those who wanted to bring others down to make themselves feel better. It really made me take a step back and re-evaluate where my life was headed. I am a firm believer that your life reflects those you have around you.
Being with like-minded people
I remember talking to Mike about how I didn’t want to be that negative person anymore. I really sat and thought do I want people to remember me being a complete bitch to them and remembering all the nasty comments I have ever said to or about them? Or… Do I want them to remember how I encouraged them to do things that inspire them deep within their soul? Do I want people to remember me being generous with my time, my words, or anything else I could offer to them?
What really helped was being with someone who has the same goals in life as I do. Definitely, since Mike and I got together a lot of things have changed. Obviously, he is just a naturally laid back person. Unlike me who is neurotic as well as constantly worried and over-thinks EVERYTHING! I have really embraced being more laid back and really try not to overthink things before they happen. We talk a lot about where we see ourselves in the future to where it just came naturally for us to do a life audit. When we would discuss our life we always end up asking ourselves the same 4 questions to evaluate who, what, where, when, and how to make our lives continue on the path we wanted it to. Without even realizing it we were auditing our lives together.
Life Audit Question 1
Where do we see our lives going?
We see us working for ourselves, owning our own house and our own business, but most of all living our best life. Enjoying everything in life that the world has to offer us. We want to be inspired everywhere we turn that we always do something fun or creative. To be challenged by the people or places around us and to feed off the energy being given. We really think about how people, situations, or places are affecting us. We evaluate everything current in our lives to see if it is helping us or stunting us from growing. To see if everything we are doing is pushing us toward our goals. If not its time to hit the drawing board again and ask ourselves those 4 questions
It’s not just a yearly thing, as I said we check in with each other every month or so to stay on track. If one of us feels uneasy about something. We do the life audit and see what we can change that accommodates both of our needs or wants.
Life Audit Question 2
What kind of people do we want to be?
Something in me just gravitates towards encouraging people and helping anyone in need around me. Talking with Mike, we decided we would get together every couple of months and do a life audit to keep us on track. With the end result being our happiness and being people who add value to others’ lives. We want to be people who help others live there best life. We want to be people who support and encourage anyone’s dreams, who are there to bounce ideas off of, problems or just experiences, and are definitely not going to drag others down because things are not ideal in their lives.
Above all what we want is for people to feel at peace when they leave us. So then, when things are happening that are not great in their life, they feel like they can figure it out. However, in order for us to achieve that we need to work on our own happiness.
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Life Audit Question 3
What kind of people do we want in our life?
We want to be around people who are not constantly negative and bring down our energy. It puts us in a bad mood and makes us unmotivated. 2019 is the year we really separated from people/situations that don’t understand us as people. We separated ourselves from the people who didn’t want to. I am not saying they are not bad people, its just not our cup of tea. Mike and I have a vision for our life. With that being said, certain people or situations are not for us and we won’t put ourselves in them anymore.
For example, I have run into people from high school who are still the same. They have no dreams of changing and are clearly content with the way their life is and that is fine, great for them that they are OK with that. Whereas Mike and I are not. We have a lot of dreams that we want to do and things to experience. This blog was one of them.
Life Audit Question 4
What have we learned in the last 6 months to a year doing life audits?
Last but not least, we have thought about what we have learned from the past years. What people we wanted in our lives and what feeling do we want to exude to those around us. These past 7 years we have become very aware of the “toxic” people or situations we were putting ourselves in.
Although, Its really hard to distance yourself from those, especially when they have been in your life for so long. However, at the end of each year, we do one big assessment of our life to see if everything is going in the direction we want it to go in.
Again, if it isn’t… It is time to make a change. Time to ask ourselves those 4 life audit questions and make the necessary changes.
Look at the past year
We look at the past year to learn more about what we liked and what we did like. For the most part, 2018 wasn’t a great year, but a lot was learned. About life, about us, about our relationship, and about the relationships we have with people in our life. This was the time we really started distancing myself from people who we felt were not growing with us.
Never in our wildest dreams did we think we could or would make this blog official. Previously, I have had people who thought it was stupid because they didn’t understand. So, I didn’t stick with it. I also wanted to make videos to share the things we were doing to inspire other people. I didn’t stick with it because AGAIN people thought it was stupid.
Life Audit Inspiration
I watched this video on YouTube that made something just click in my head. It was Mama Bee from the Eh Bee Family on YouTube. She recently made a video called “Let’s talk about the F Word”. I learned that it was OK to tell people no. It is also OK to choose me or my family over someone else, in order to do the things we want. Mike and I need to do the things we want for our own happiness and our own sanity. Like exploring places we have never been, check out our adventure to Cedar Key and Rosewood
Her video was so inspiring. Especially when she said her family only consists of her husband and her kids because she chose to get married and chose to have kids. However, anyone outside of that is just a relative. It took her a long time to realize that relatives were treating her like crap and a lot of their unhappiness was coming from the interactions with their relatives.
It is OK to do what’s best for you
As a result, her words echoed in my head.. not just for family, but for friends and jobs as well. It affects all relationships personal and professional. We don’t have to say yes to everything. In my life I chose to be with Mike, I chose to be a step-mother to his children. Those 3 people are my family.
Above all, their happiness is what matters the most, besides my own. It’s OK for us to do our own thing. It’s OK for us to want to live our lives the way we want to. In the meantime, In order to be the person we want to be, we need to take care of our little family. Otherwise, we are useless. We need to do the things that inspire us to be the best version of ourselves.
Ask yourself those 4 life audit questions
All in all, I think its time to ask yourself that 4 life audit questions and what you are going to do to make it happen. A life audit really helps. It really gets you thinking about the people and situations you are in on a daily basis. It forces you to ask yourself if they are benefiting you or if they are holding you back.
I really hope this post inspires all of you to go hardcore for what you want. How does the saying go? Kick-ass and take names later. I know that is what Mike and I are doing right now.
So, please let me know in the comments below what are your dreams and how are you making them come true? I would love to comment back and give you some encouraging words!
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Until Next Time, Have a Great Day!